kali pornia

i want to be more like the ocean. no talking and all action.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

fielD TRIP


so yesterday my five co-workers and i were stuffed in a minivan on a 45 minute drive to dc.

on the trip there mostly we discussed my relationship. ok and if there were going to be any cute single boys at the luncheon we were attending. (shuddup the two are not exclusive)

then we had lunch with the 50 other people in our program that we never see only ever talk to on the phone except for this once a year luncheon and odd visits to our office.

of the three single guys one was black. no i have no problem with dating black dudes but if i'm going to date a black dude they should at least SOUND black. i mean why the fuck would i date a black guy if he were really white. i could just date a white guy. the point is that i talk to this guy on the phone at least one a week and i had NO IDEA he was black. ah well.

so the other two were gay. GAY GAY GAY. and the only other female in my office has no GAYDAR. NONE. ha.

so on the way back my boss starts talking about a book he was perusing in borders. the book was called "why men fall asleep after sex." he said it had a part in it that men were not supposed to read.

i then expounded my old theory of how women should take over the world. that we should syncronize our extra-curricular activities and then while the men are sleeping we could use our SUPERENERGY to take over the WORLD bwahahaha...

then my boss tells us that the book says that men secrete a hormone during ORGASM that tells the body "go to sleep now."

then he tells the part that men aren't supposed to know. (cover your ears, men) women's bodies secrete the same exact hormone when they climax. and it effects the body the same exact way...

only sometimes...



wait for it...




uh. women don't climax.

(men you can uncover your ears)

and NOW (not before) my boss knows entirely TOO much about my sexlife.