kali pornia

i want to be more like the ocean. no talking and all action.

Friday, December 03, 2004

except for the west wing


i just shouldn't watch tv.

it makes me angry. i think everybody's stoopid.

i spent some three odd hours in front of the tv last night.

first the apprentice. then it was OC or CSI so i went to ralphs and to get some champurrado.

mmmmm, champurrado. (at least i've stopped calling it chupacabra.)

i came back and watched primetime even though i didn't want to. brad pitt was on. i think some other people were too. something to do with a new movie called ocean's twelve, maybe you've heard of it. in la you can't miss it. they've been on billboards since what seems like last fucking year.

but brad pitt sucked me in. don cheadle was funnier, smarter, and quicker than the rest. but i didn't tune in 'cuz of don cheadle.

dianne sawyer tried to make us believe she is just like us normal folk. in awe of the super-stardom by which she was surrounded. clooney, cheadle, damon, zeta-jones, garcia, and, of course, pitt.

if diane sawyer's normal folk, then selma hayek is an actress, and if selma hayek is an actress, then i'm a god damned movie star.

(btw -- hayek's on inside the actor's studio this week. you missed J Lo.)

and what's up with the apprentice? these are really the people best fit to run trump's businesses? the losing chick took her skirt off -- off i tell ya -- to sell a candy bar for $20.

the two girls on the winning team sold all of their candy bars for $5 a piece. because they sexed it up. not too much though -- they were still able to sell to families and women and shit.


what i don't get is that not one of the people on the boys' team realized who fucking eats chocolate.

WOMEN EAT CHOCOLATE.

women, you morons.

so kevin and kelly (one black one white -- relatively good-looking men) could've gotten $10 a bar if they'd just sexed it up a little. they were wearing ugly tshirts and had no sex appeal whatsoever.

if a hot guys in tank tops were selling these gd bars they could've gotten every PMS-ing woman on the street to buy one. no matter the price. whatever. i have no idea why i care. i mean i don't. i don't care. i just got caught up in it.

which brings me back to my original point.

i just shouldn't watch tv.